My best form of expression-My Paintings -

I have been painting for a while.I used to do water earlier and then moved to oils.
I dont paint much in a year but I do paint whenever I feel strongly about something or somebody.I have painted when I have been very hurt ,very angry,very happy or very in love.Its the only form of expression that helps me vent out whatever is caged in me. If I am very happy all I can do is jump,smile for a while and then I dont know what to do to let that happiness come out.So I paint.And after I have painted,It just feels like my happiness is all over and all around me and I feel so contented.When I am upset or angry,its the same story,If i speak I ll speak rubbish and there is no way I can express what I am feeling to anybody and I dont expect anybody to be able to understand what and how and why about my feelings and thoughts running in my head at that point of time and so I paint.After the painting is complete,I feel like I have expressed myself the best I could and my ire just poofs away. And then there are times when I am very very hurt or very touched,overwhelmed by some feeling,overwhelmed by some person,action,thoughts.At such times,I might be able to describe what I am feeling but I feel that nobody would understand how profound the hurt or the importance of that person or relationship in my life is;and so I paint.I paint about that feeling,about that relationship,about those thoughts.I paint for that person or for that dream which/who affects me so deeply.

The paintings I have made in Bangalore are `Calm Rage` ,one of my favourites which I made when i was trying to get back to my equanimity after a terrible fit of rage.Then there is something called `Tears`,dont have to explain much about that I am sure.Then there is the optimistic `Life goes on`.
And then I have some very personal paintings,Soul Mesh,Ittaikan-this means oneness or togetherness,then there is Jim Morrison and Grateful dead.
Soul Mesh is a set of 2 paintings called `soul mesh`.Both of them together form what I wanted to depict there. I did not name them when I painted them or even after I painted them.I did not name them 6 months after I painted them.I named them last night.
Currently I am working on the biggest and most important painting I have ever made,not just in size but in thought and time.In this painting I am trying to evince my past one year and the thoughts and my relationship with the most important person in my life.Hope it turns out well.